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|Subject: Are You Addicted to Love: The Difference Between a Love Relationship and Being Addicted to Love. Tue Aug 30, 2011 11:42 pm|| |
Here is a question for all those people out there (you know who you are) who tend to go over that line between being in love and being addicted to love. Feel free to pass on this quiz to any of your friends who could use a little self-awareness as well.
What is the difference between being in a healthy love relationship vs. being addicted to love?
Everyone wants to be in love, to feel loved and to love. This is a very normal desire and goal for everyone. Yet, for some people, love can change from a normal wanting to an urgent need. It can turn into an obsession and take over one's life.
How do you define a love addiction? You have a love addiction when you see love as the only way to numb your inner pain, loneliness and emptiness. When you have a love addiction you see the relationship as all-consuming. There is nothing else in life that is as important. When you have a love addiction, a break- up can give you a desperate need to regain this person as well as a feeling of guilt or shame about one's weakness to let go of him.
In a healthy relationship, being in love should make you feel good, most of the time. In case of a love addiction, there is a high, a feeling of elation, giddiness, and feeling that this is the only person for you in your life. When these feelings fade away, the love addict will do anything to regain this love even at the price of submerging their own wants, and their own personality into that of the loved one by denying their own needs and fully identifying with their partner desires. It feels like a love or death situation to the love addict.
Are you addicted to love? Take this quiz and find out:
1. Do you feel that life without that special person is manageable or would losing them make you feel empty and lost?
2. When you meet someone special do your moods go up and down, but eventually return to normal or do you have extreme mood swings going from extremely happy to desperately depressed?
3. Do you notice that you fall in love extremely quickly. Is it all or nothing for you?
4. Do most of your relationships only last a few weeks or months?
5. After a little while of being in a stable relationship, are you tempted to look for someone "better"?
6. When you and your partner disagree, do you fear the relationship is over?
7. Do you find yourself staying in a relationship because you need him, or because you can't be alone; rather than feeling loved.
8. Do you find yourself doing things with this person that you would not normally do in any other relationship?
9. Do you feel more insecure or suspicious than usual, in this relationship?
10. Do you know deep inside that this person isn't right for you, but something keeps you there?
11. Do you have a strong feeling that this relationship is unhealthy but feel unable to break away?
12. When the relationship is over, do you feel panic and lost, fearful that you may never find someone to love you?
If you answered "yes" to more than 3 questions, you may have a problem with love addiction.
The good news is that it is fixable. Being aware of the problem is the first step to conquering it.
In every difficult situation is potential value. Believe this, then begin looking for it.